In the roadmap I made, I included notable events from throughout the book. Specifically, I included events from the book that had lessons to be learned from the Dad’s responses. The first 4 events I included have qualities over the description - they were events where the Dad’s actions showed leadership, selfishness, defensiveness and selflessness. Above each of the qualities, arrows go further up along the road to connect to where the boy currently is.

This design of the roadmap was intentional. Throughout the reading, McCarthy’s storytelling has been a little confusing, but the characters’ reactions (with different events) have stood out to me and guided my understanding.

At the beginning of the book the mom would pass away. The situation was tough but the dad knew they couldn’t afford to wait, so they started off on the journey. I understood this event for the Dad’s response to the tragedy; he was strong, and a leader. As the book continues, we get looks into even crazier events. I’ve understood each event for the character’s reactions - and I think that this goes with what must have been McCarthys intention; McCarthy sets up the bulk of the book with this confusing variety of event’s, and it all builds up to the end where the boy is left (sort of) alone. In these events, the character reactions point out the learning, and takeaways the boy must have had, leaving us with a significant question. I think that McCarthy constructed all of these learning events together to leave us wondering about what will happen with the boy left alone? How he will apply what he’s learned.

In our last reading, the ¨underground club¨ like scene stood out to me more than anything else has so far. It was action packed, and arguably the most significant part of the book.

The craziness of this scene started off before the party with Offred and the commander alone. The commander ¨gifted¨ what sounded like a lingerie costume type of piece to Offred. Of course, as if getting this piece wasn’t already a big enough shock with it´s illegality in Gilead, Offred noted that this piece also appeared to be used.

Once Offred and the Commander were ready, Nick would chauffeur them past ¨checkpoints¨ to the location of the party, and Offred would need to duck down along the way. Offred noted that Nick seemed familiar with the route to take and the time to return. Her suspicion of this being a routine event for the Commander, with other women who potentially even wore her same outfit, was clear.

Once at the hotel lobby, Offred and the commander walked into a fancy party, cautious of not drawing attention. For Offred, this should have been an all time highlight! The first taste of fun since she lived outside of Guilead! But it wasn’t ; her already uncomfortable night was somehow worsened.

Offred described sitting down on a couch for the first part of the party. Around her, similarly dressed party goers in costumes lingered. But who were they? At first this seemed unclear to Offred. But soon later, the commander would go up to a group of men to, as Offred described, both show off to the men by pointing her out and show off to her by showing his many friends.

With this, the people at the party became more clear: they seemed to be women, and other powerful figures of Guilead. It seemed like Offred immediately understood what this meant. She had been living in this awful society for so long, valued solely for her reproductive use and literally named after the commander (Of-fred). Yet with all of this, the people of power in Gilead were hypocrites?! Blatantly breaking many of Guilead´s rules together in a party setting?! As I read this, I couldn’t imagine many things that would have been more demeaning to Offred. As if things weren’t already bad enough. Because of the obvious significance, choosing this to create an art piece was a no brainer. For my piece, I used a platform called ¨Dall-e¨ to make an AI generated image. In generating the image, I described ¨a hotel lobby party with fancy women and commanders lingering, with a couch at the front where a woman and man sit¨. I was pleased with how the image included everything, but what I like most is the blurriness. In Offred’s description of the scene, it seemed crazy, secretive and mysterious. The level of the blurriness did a perfect job of portraying all the knowns (Offred gave us) of the scene like the fancy outfits, couch and lobby - yet making it unclear: open to interpretation.

In the Handmaid’s Tale, we follow Offred through her day to day life that seems traumatizing in so many different ways. Offred experiencing awful relationships herself, and bearing witness to gruesome images of those around her are just some of the common occurrences her day may include - yet through all of this, were reminded multiple times of Offred’s desire to steal something.

At a first glance, this repeated detail can seem like it´s unnoteworthy, and a strange choice of a detail to repeat - quite literally in the context of safety concerning situations. To me though, Offred’s desire to steal something seems deeper: it seems like a fight for something to represent herself with.

In our world, I see self expression as fundamental to human existence - people represent their values, identity and aspirations in everything they do. Whether in person or online, communities people choose to be a part of are key to their identity - identity can be signaled or fulfilled by joining religious congregations, social groups and sports clubs. Clothing items also let people show off their individual style, and sometimes even show beliefs for social / political norms.

In Gilead, Offred has none of this. She, along with all the other women of Guiliad are stripped from their personalities and valued by society solely for their labor and reproductive roles. Women are classified by their roles: Wives, Handmaids who have babies, or Martha’s who clean and cook. Handmaid’s like Offred take on the literal names of their commanders (¨Of - Fred¨), and all of them are assigned a strict dress code.

I don’t see Offred’s desire to steal something as an evil craving, a means to upset the item’s owner or even just a desire to get a useful item. I see it as solely a craving for something to represent herself. Who wouldn’t crave this item like if they were in Gilead? Offred stealing this item would object to the rules of Guilead, object to the roles of power, and give her a physical, rebellious keepsake. Looking at it would be a reminder to how she did not conform to Guilad’s rules - she was better than them!

Later in the text on pages 136-137, once we’re already introduced to Offred’s desire, Atwood seems to further touch on this interest and illustrate it as a true personal Journey Offred feels she needs : Offred says “It’s an old one, he said, a curio of sorts. From the seventies, I think. A Vogue. This like a wine connoisseur dropping a name. I thought you might like to look at it. I hung back. He might be testing me, to see how deep my indoctrination had really gone. It’s not permitted, I said. In here, it is, he said quietly. I saw the point. Having broken the main taboo, why should I hesitate over another one, something minor? Or another, or another; who could tell where it might stop? Behind this particular door, taboo dissolved.”

Initially, this was confusing. It goes against the sensible solution of why we kept hearing about Offred’s desire to steal something. How does an antique, rare Vogue article not sound like the perfect thing? How could Offred be such a beggar and chooser? It even had the illegal element that Offred desired?! Later on though, I realized the embarrassingly obvious intention as to why this was included by Atwood, that answers all of the questions as to why the item stealing was brought up so many times: this desire of an item, isn’t just a desire for a single physical item that represents Offred, it’s a desire for the journey of that item. The commander giving this item to Offred, not only takes away from the illegality and power proving desire of truly stealing something - but it also makes it come from someone she hates.

Offred recognizes she is far from herself ; Offred even recounts memories of her younger self in an alien-like way. For Offred, this item stealing detail shows us that she needs this personal improvement - but even if she steals the perfect item - Offred will be far from fulfilled. Assuming that Atwood will eventually wrap up the book in some heartwarming way (given so far gruesome nature) that completes Offred’s journey - makes me think that something big will happen. No simple end to the book like Guilead’s end to the oppressive society or Offred’s escape could do the job ; I think Offred will have to do something incredibly dominant to reach a far opposite of the power she feels now. Maybe kill the commander.